The last line in the last performance was your best yet. There was something to it that wasn't there before. You should have heard the story I heard at intermission - I don't know if it will be the same when I re-tell it.
It took only a brief moment for things to click into place - though it seemed too strange to be true, what was written on the note was for her, and there was no mistaking it. There was, of course, why, and the way it found itself in her hands was unusual…but stranger things had happened.
She was close to letting it flutter to the ground and stay ignored, and had it been another message, another reference, she probably would have, hesitation or no. This one, however, called up a memory she could not shake away with a toss of her head, and though it had been a happy one, it had long since been tainted. Sigyn felt far away from the shared laughter she could still hear, and the girl who’d shared the decidedly dirty joke all that time ago could not possibly resemble her very much.
But she remembered the end of the joke, and it kept coming to her even after she had stuck the note inside a book as a marker. It insisted on running itself through her mind until she could remember every nuance of her own voice in the telling, and how in the end their heads had been close together as they tried to keep their laughter down.
She does not want to think of all this, and finally, with no way to stop herself from going back to that moment again and again, she takes a blank piece of paper and writes down the missing part of the joke. She does not laugh, or even smile, but after it is written down she feels a vague sort of relief. Adding her note to the other, Sigyn goes about her daily routine, and acts as though it is nothing out of the ordinary when she sticks the new note close to where she found the first.
When the earthquake hit, her eyes flew open and she sat up, hands clutching in the air trying to hold up a bowl that wasn't there. She thought she had dozed off while watching over Loki, that she had fallen asleep and let the bowl slip. When she realized the truth, she fell back against her pillow, staring off at nothing and willing her panic to go away.
[Private]
Sometimes it feels as though this life isn't real, that I did doze away and all of this is just a dream in between drops of the poison.